Loco for Four Loko

October 27, 2010

So after much publicity this week, the dearly beloved alcoholic-energy drink Four Loko, has been facing the brutal beatings of health officials, parents, news reporters everywhere.  It’s been a sweeping sensation across college campuses since it hit the shelves of your local convenient store nearly one year ago. But the media will only tell you one thing: You better hide yo kids, hide yo wife, because its raping everybody’s (liver) out there.

Many news sources including The Huffington Post, CBS News, and MSNBC have been reporting this week about the negative effects of the drink, urging to public to stay away, and talk about some states actually placing a “Four Loko ban” in their jurisdiction. This all comes after last week’s story of 9 students from Central Washington University being hospitalized when found passed out at a party. The students claimed that they thought they were roofied, when in fact, they just “tested positive” for Four Loko. But really? They thought they were roofied? Turns out that those 9 college kids were really 17-19 year olds who were “inexperienced drinkers”.

Washington state Attorney General, Rob McKenna stated: “It’s time to bring an end to the sale of alcoholic energy drinks…They’re marketed to kids by using fruit flavors that mask the taste of alcohol, and they have such high levels of stimulants that people have no idea how inebriated they really are.”

Marketed to kids? Are we really going to give Four Loko this credit? I’m calling BS. McKenna and the rest of the country are just using Four Loko as a scapegoat for irresponsible drinking.

For starters, who is to say that people over the age of 21 don’t like bright colors or fruit flavors? I know that I certainly do. I also know that Four Lokos are not sold to the under-aged, and like all other alcoholic products, you need proof of identification. Do we really think that someone is going to buy a 7-year old a Four Loko? And if they did, the better question is do we really think that a 7-year old would even want to drink that Four Loko? Reports are stating that Four Loko comes in appealing flavors and colors- but anyone who has every actually tried a can could tell you that they do not taste anything like they sound.

That element of the thirsty, underaged teen grabbing for the controversial drink will always be there. It is not because they are brightly colored, its because they are teenagers and they have always wanted to drink illegally. Four Loko did not suddenly revolutionize an entire country’s thirst for alcohol.

And for people not knowing how drunk they are going to get when a Four Loko is consumed? It is clearly stated on the can that the drink has a alcohol level of up to 12%. Even though the feeling of being drunk can be slightly delayed with caffeine, with 23.5 oz of 12% alcohol anyone should expect to be drunk. And really drunk for that matter. But that is the exact reason why people buy it: because it has that high content, and its cheap…really cheap. At $2.50 a can, Four Loko has replaced traditional 40. oz in the hearts of broke college kids and homeless people everywhere.

This problem is about alcohol education, not Four Loko. Many colleges require a alcohol edu. class for all incoming freshman to teach them what is a legal limit is, and what a deathly limit is. For those students who could not retain this information, they might learn it the hard way ( which was previously by shotgunning 12 beers) or now the easier way (by drinking more than a Four Loko).  Regardless, people who are not accustom the binge-drinking-actions of college kids might call the drink a epidemic.

The media should stop scrutinizing the drink that makes people “loko”, but instead the irresponsible drinkers who do not know how to handle alcohol consumption. Id even applaud anyone who could get through a whole can of the stuff.

Needless to say, I found my Halloween costume this year.



2 Responses to “Loco for Four Loko”

  1. Valentine said

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